The Sweetest Vengeance

To-Do List Be Better Words Dry Erase BoardWe all get hurt. People will come and go, others wouldn’t like you, you’ll get a broken heart and endless reasons to feel down and discouraged. Every single day can be a challenge for you to be happy and feel good.

But have you ever thought of getting back to those people who wronged you?

There is one sweet vengeance that I can recommend – A happy smile in a better you.

If someone has hurt you. Kill yourself – kill your old self and replace it with someone better that you were. Start creating a new you.

They say , ” The most painful events in one’s life, makes the biggest change.”

Changing yourself into the best person that you can be will be the biggest revenge that you can ever have. People will try to steal your smile on your face but don’t let them win. Let them be beaten by their own guilt and just get up, do your thing and be happy.

Always remember, Misery loves company. If someone makes you feel miserable, it means they are miserable themselves and they just needed a companion to be like them as well. So spare them. Never go down to their level and be the “you” that you had always been. Just let karma do its job. What goes around comes around.

Why We Liked the Movie Frozen and the Song “Let It Go”

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know
Well, now they know

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door

I don’t care
What they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on,
The cold never bothered me anyway.

When people were expecting some fairytale-ish ending kiss from true love, it surprised us with a much better and sensible ending.

I am also one of the millions who were mesmerized with that Disney movie and that verse above is my favorite part of the song “Let it Go” and the reason why I’ve loved the movie.

But have it ever occurred to you why this has been a hit?

Maybe because most of us has that “hidden self” that we would like to show to the world but we are just so scared, just like Elsa.

We want to liberate ourselves from those restrictions that the world build around us and sometimes, limitations that we also build ourselves – self inflicting limits. Some were considered social norms that has been accepted ever since and we are in no position to bend any of those so-called rules.

The song Let it go connotes empowerment, freedom and most importantly being loved despite our imperfections.

In one of my favorite books, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, he has described us as wounded and scarred individuals. We are like leper wherein, we would try so hard to hide those wounds to those around us that is why we are creating a facade to conceal that “true part” of ourselves. Those that are unflattering, weird, unacceptable and those part of ourselves that we really hate.

Just being our self is the biggest fear of humans.

But nobody abuses us more than we abuse ourselves.

We have that part that we thought others couldn’t accept because we ourselves can not accept too.

When Elsa’s unusual power was known to the world, she chose to be free but alone. She’d rather live by herself in a far away place than be with people who won’t accept her and judge her as a sorcerer.

Never did she know that all she has to do was to love and accept that part of her so she can control her powers.

The more self-love we have, the less we will experience self-abuse. Self-abuse comes from self rejection,and self-rejection comes from having an image of what it means to be perfect and never measuring up to that ideal.”

“Only the act of true love can thaw a frozen heart.”

Sometimes we only need one person to accept and love us for who are. To accept that we aren’t perfect and we are flawed individual. And sometimes, that one person is just ourselves.

Sometimes, all we need is to just let it go.

What is Grit?

Grit is passion and perseverance for long-term goal. Stamina.Sticking with your future. Grit is living life like a Marathon, not a sprint.

There are many talented individuals who simply do not follow through on their commitments. In fact, in our data, grit is usually unrelated or even inversely related to measures of talent.

- Angela Lee Duckworth

I’ve always been a firm believer of working with passion and this just validated what I had always thought of. It is not the IQ or talent that can make you successful but your willingness to fail and your commitment to your dreams.

One of my vows for this year would be to watch more motivational talks like this. Consider this as the start of sharing more motivation talks of different people from all over the world.

Be Fearless to Commit Mistakes

Erase your mistakes

Because of our fear to commit mistakes, we tend to stay on the safe side of the road. We’d rather be at the gutter and be safe, than cross the road and discover what is in the other side of the world.

This being “safe” isn’t only about the fear of the unknown but also the fear of committing something that we can not control.

We could also be afraid of criticisms and what would other people perceive about us.

I had always admired bold and daring people because they have the guts to just be themselves in front of other people regardless of what others might think about them. They are so secure that even hurtful comments wouldn’t matter to them, as if they are invincible.

Sometimes, this fear can also equate to inactivity. We’d rather do nothing than risk the chance of being heard and making a difference because of this fear of committing mistakes.

Mistakes could also mean failure. Aside from public humiliation, personal disappointments and frustrations, failure because of your mistakes, could be very disheartening too. That’s why it’s very understandable that we would really fear committing one.

Nevertheless, failure can never be fatal. We can always move on from it every time and at the same time, we move on with accompanying new lessons and learning from that experience.

As long as you have anchored your values and you always do things according to what you think is right, then failing may be very difficult as first but you can always move forward and start all over again.

They say there are 3 ways to learn:
1. Through Books and School
Where the Do’s and Don’ts are presented to you the traditional way.

2. Through Other People’s Experiences/ Mistakes
You’d be inspired by how other people manage their lives and of course, you can learn from them.

3. Through Your Own Experiences/ Mistakes
This is the most difficult but this will give you your most valued learning. This will have the best impact in your life and will allow you to learn big time.

That’s why no matter how your books and your school will try to teach you, experience will always be your best teacher.

What is a Leader?

Team leader

A few months back, my team leader with my whole team had a few leadership discussion and his first question for us was, “What is a Leader?”

My team mates had their own version of what a leader is.
But, here is what I said,

“A leader is someone who dares to be different and knows how to see the bigger picture.”

Right then, it sounded insufficient and made me mull over my complete definition of what a true leader is.

Yes, a leader must dare to be different because he has to make a difference. But, on the other hand, he didn’t specified his question. He could have asked, “What are the qualities of a good leader?” Because, as I ruminate about his question, it made me realize that there are two types of leaders: A good leader and a bad leader.

So, here is my complete answer to that question.

“A leader dares to be different, has a heart to serve, can speak their minds, can pour their heart out in whatever they do and has the ability to see the total picture of any situation; from different angles and perspectives.”

Have you notice the repetitive words from that phrase? The words: different and heart.

Both good and bad leaders can be different but what separates the two is a heart. A good leader works from the heart and a good leader has a heart to serve his people.